Dysfunction: Listening—Genesis 47: 1-11; James 1: 19-27
We continue our series on ending dysfunction this week. Today we are focusing on listening skills and how we can be better followers of Jesus through our ability to listen rather than being quick to speak. A prominent Southern Baptist leader, Russell Moore, wrote an article a few years ago about the struggles pastors face when speaking some of the harder words of Jesus.
Several pastors had complained to him that after preaching the Sermon on the Mount, including all of the blessed statements, turn the other cheek, and so on, the congregation would come up and ask, “Where did you get that mess?” The pastors would say, “It’s the literal words of Jesus. In red. In the gospel.” And the reply would be, “Yeah, but that doesn’t work anymore. That sounds weak. Stop preaching it.”
As a society, we’ve come to a point where we don’t want to hear or listen to things that are too challenging or push us to question too much. Listening closely inevitably requires us to evaluate and consider things that may contradict what we believe. Hearing Jesus speak certainly did that in his day. But critical evaluation is meant to push us closer to Jesus, not makes us frustrated. Today we look at three ways of listening that can help us grow in our faith: listening to understand, listening to respond, and listening to act. Each of these can be needed in different situations. The lessons for today give us guidance on when to use them and in many cases, why.
First, we consider listening to understand. When Joseph tells of his dream of the sun, moon, and eleven stars bowing down to him, he is pointedly rebuked by his father. I am sure for a few minutes, his father realizes that Joseph may be a bit spoiled by all the favoritism. His father, however, does have a strong dose of wisdom and experience in dreams and signs from God, so after the initial irritation, his father wonders what it could mean. The wiser part of Jacob knows that God speaks in dreams, and he realizes that he should listen to understand what is being said.
This is an art form we have lost in our modern society. We tend to only listen to debate or rebuke. I see it in my cases where the pleas and outcries of victims, especially children or persons with disabilities are ignored or discounted. We all see it when we attempt any kind of political discourse in our society. We’ve become so focused on being right that we don’t often hear the pain or confusion or worry that might be behind another person’s challenging words. And, may I add, if we cannot pause to listen to each other, how can we ever listen to God? How many of us even doubt that God is still speaking?
Jacob had a gut reaction to Joseph’s dream. It hit Jacob hard, but he also knew that there may be something important for him to know. Listening to understand means we hear not just the words a person says, but the who behind the words and the why. When someone speaks words of challenge from a place of vulnerability, they are coming to us as followers of Jesus to help them. It costs us nothing to say, “I hear you. It’s hard to listen to. But let’s talk about why you feel this way and how it’s affecting you.” God calls us to listen to understand, not just what God says to us, but to listen to one another as well.
Other times we need to listen to respond. We read several times of the brothers’ hatred of Joseph and how they couldn’t say a kind word to him. We read of their ever-deepening hatred after Joseph’s dream. Now, I am certain that none of this was a secret. If they speak in unkind words, engage in hatred, and are bad to Joseph, everyone had to know. Joseph is also a bit of a tattletale. I’m sure he would have said something. Yet it never gets addressed. Sometimes when we hear words and actions that are unkind and unjust it begs of us to speak up and say something.
When I took training on mediation, we were told that sometimes people need to simply vent, and you have to just sit and listen. Siblings often need to do this, I’m sure. But there comes a point where we have to stand up and say, “You’ve said enough. It’s time to stop.” If we think back to being teenagers or parenting teenagers, I’m sure we remember that moment when talking (or sassing) had to cease. Had Jacob or his wives addressed the brothers’ words and behaviors, perhaps their hearts might not have gotten to such a dark and dangerous place.
Every election season, I feel like saying, “That’s enough, please stop talking.” As followers of Jesus, we have a calling to speak truth and speak the word of God. If we are timid about speaking the words of Jesus, then who will do so? Sometimes we have to speak the hard truths when folks may not want to hear it, even if it is chapter and verse right out of God’s word. It’s a bit step towards boldness if we tend to be the quiet one in life. And yet we know that God gave the strength to speak, to preach, and to teach to every disciple through the power of the Spirit.
Lastly, we must also listen to act. The book of James tells us, “But don’t just listen to God’s word. You must do what it says. Otherwise, you are only fooling yourselves.” For James, faith is active and engaged. It’s not just an endeavor to talk about. That stands to reason. What is the point of believing and knowing about faith if we don’t live it? Pope Francis once rather famously said, “You pray for the hungry, then you feed them. This is how prayer works.”
One of the hallmarks of Jesus’s ministry is that he always called out the powerful and the prideful, but he spoke words of love and care to the broken, the hurting, the poor, the sick and the “least of these” as we’ve come to call them from the Gospel of Matthew. We must also remember in the Easter story we just heard that Jesus was poor, broken, hurt, and ultimately killed unjustly. He borrowed a donkey to ride into Jerusalem. He suffered under the Roman punishment. He was spoken to viciously by the mob and religious leaders. And ultimately, he died brutally and horribly. Perhaps that is why we are told that however we treat the least in our society is how we are treating Jesus.
God’s word calls on us to act in ways that testify to the grace and goodness of God. The Bible is more than just a study book. It is a call to action for us to live faithful, Christ-centered lives in this world where wickedness often prevails and where bad actors win when we feel the need to “tone it down.” May worry and intimidation never win out over the voice of God stirring us to live out our faith in this world. For again, if not us, then whom?
There are three ways to listen as God’s people which overcome our limited and sometimes dysfunctional behaviors. First, we listen to understand. For those who need us to see and hear beyond the words and into what hurts the soul, our understanding and willingness to hear and heal is crucial. Second, we listen to respond. There comes a time where must encourage those who dwell in words which fall short of God’s grace to reorient themselves back to words of truth and love—for themselves and others. Finally, we must listen to act. Dysfunction, chaos, and evil run amok when we aren’t willing to stand up and do something.
The words of the Gospel may at times be challenging. To hear all of Jesus’s teachings can be very hard in modern society. We want to fit in, blend in, cling to what makes us comfortable. But the Gospel should be anything but complacent and comfortable. A writer I follow on Instagram summed up how the Gospel words should affect us as we hear them, listen to them, and do them. She writes, “[W]hen I meet my maker, I hope my hands are dirty from building something better. I want to hand back a life used fully. Scratched. Scarred. Lived.” And so, may we listen even as God continues to speak.
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